Fearless, a poem

#fromthejournalfridays continues with a poem on being fearless from church last year; before leaving for London, before meeting Chris (my now husband), these were the words on my heart:

May 5, 2019

you're calling me out of fear into safety, 
not just courage 
not just conquering 
because those aren't for me 
to do or be 
it is for you to breakthrough and change everything 
but first, safety:
a meal, communion. 
peace. joy. enjoyment 
of what is given, 
what safety is, means. 
you're not calling me to conquer my fear today; 
you're calling me to be safe, 
to rest in your embrace 
to know that my name is fearless-- 
my name is fearless. 
I can get up and follow you 
because it's safe here 
the risks I take,
I do not take alone. 
it is safe here. 
my heart is safe in your hands. 

I do not have to make myself fearless-- 
you make me brave 
and you know me as fearless 
you know my true identity 
behind the walls I hide behind 
to placate the fears 
and make myself safe. 
you shatter the barriers. 
you already have once. 
you'll do it again, 
but this time it won't break me. 
this time it'll build me 
it'll build something brand new. 
something safe.